Rules: You must grant the previous wish in an unexpected and unwanted way. Then state your wish for the next player to grant. If a wish isn't granted in 24 hours you may post a new wish.
Example: I wish I owned 40 acres of bottom land.
Granted! Good luck farming the bottom of Lake Huron.
I wish I had some popcorn
Quote from: NT2C on June 17, 2021, 04:09:38 PM
Rules: You must grant the previous wish in an unexpected and unwanted way. Then state your wish for the next player to grant. If a wish isn't granted in 24 hours you may post a new wish.
Example: I wish I owned 40 acres of bottom land.
Granted! Good luck farming the bottom of Lake Huron.
I wish I had some popcorn
Wish granted: you have popcorn. Lots of popcorn actually seeing how you have almost two dozen machines to make it. Because you own a chain of movie theaters. Know what you don't have? Customers. None. Nada. See, there's been this pesky global pandemic and you've had exactly zero revenue for going on 16 months now. Hear that phone ringing? That's the property management company calling. Something about rent being overdue on all your leases ...
Know what I wish for? A sailboat.
Quote from: majorhavoc on June 17, 2021, 08:10:05 PM
Know what I wish for? A sailboat.
Granted, you have a sailboat, but it's beached on a small island in the south Pacific.
I wish for a working homestead.
Quote from: Nyte on June 17, 2021, 08:20:09 PM
Quote from: majorhavoc on June 17, 2021, 08:10:05 PM
Know what I wish for? A sailboat.
Granted, you have a sailboat, but it's beached on a small island in the south Pacific.
I wish for a working homestead.
Granted. Just gotta wait for that Mars colony to happen, then build some farming structures...on a largely airless planet. And there's a bit of a problem with water, too, since it'll need to be shipped in from the poles. And inoculating the sterile soil; hope you don't mind Whatneying some bacteria into it.
I wish I'd known what Ford was releasing with the Maverick
before I bought a Tundra.
Quote from: boskone on June 17, 2021, 08:30:14 PM
I wish I'd known what Ford was releasing with the Maverick before I bought a Tundra.
Granted. And you waited for the Maverick and bought one of the first of a glitchy unreliable mess cause Ford rushed it to market without proper testing and you wished you had known how much better the Tundra would be before you bought the Maverick.
I wish for a million wishes!
Quote from: RoneKiln on June 19, 2021, 12:49:31 AM
I wish for a million wishes!
Granted! There are now one million people wishing you never get another wish.
I wish I had a good cheeseburger.
Quote from: NT2C link=topic=169.msg1496#msg1496
I wish I had a good cheeseburger.
/quote]
GRANTED!
It is quite delicious. However, after taking your first bite, you leaned a little too far to one side of the table and dropped it to the floor. Your pack of attack cats then tactically surrounded it and claimed your meal as property of the state of catnippia.
I really REALLY wish I had bought that VZ58 I had in my hands 10 years ago. It was only $550.
Quote from: Lettuce Pray on June 19, 2021, 07:57:43 AM
I really REALLY wish I had bought that VZ58 I had in my hands 10 years ago. It was only $550.
Granted! You actually
did buy it, and now you're selling it to me for $200 because the medical bills due to the stroke you apparently suffered while typing that post are really piling up.
I wish I could afford unlimited ammo for it.
Quote from: NT2C on June 19, 2021, 10:00:59 AM
Quote from: Lettuce Pray on June 19, 2021, 07:57:43 AM
I really REALLY wish I had bought that VZ58 I had in my hands 10 years ago. It was only $550.
Granted! You actually did buy it, and now you're selling it to me for $200 because the medical bills due to the stroke you apparently suffered while typing that post are really piling up.
I wish I could afford unlimited ammo for it.
Granted. You were riding with Boskone to the range in his new Maverick he waited to buy instead of the Tundra when the onboard computer glitched and mixed up brakes and acceleration. Ford paid out a fortune for you losing all your limbs in the crash. They paid to replace the VZ58 that was ruined in the crash as well.
I wish Firefly hadn't been canceled.
Quote from: RoneKiln on June 19, 2021, 11:14:56 AM
I wish Firefly hadn't been canceled.
Granted, but it merged with The SImpsons, and the crew were replaced by the Simpson family.
I wish I had more motivation in my classes.
Granted. You're part of a program combining chemical and psychological treatments to improve student engagement. It works too well, though, and you have a psychotic breakdown and think you're Pac-man. After several hours wandering around campus saying "waka waka" over and over while eating anything generally pill-shaped, you encounter a ket pill which exacerbates your condition and die trying to eat a moving Fiat 500.
I wish I could find someone else to mow my lawn whenever it's over 90F.
Quote from: boskone on June 19, 2021, 02:00:54 PM
I wish I could find someone else to mow my lawn whenever it's over 90F.
Granted. The crash caused by the new Maverick that took NT2Cs limbs also left you a quadriplegic. The settlement from Ford is enough to pay someone to mow your lawn. And spoon feed you gruel.
I wish for the genie to be a normal free human.
Quote from: RoneKiln on June 19, 2021, 03:48:47 PM
Quote from: boskone on June 19, 2021, 02:00:54 PM
I wish I could find someone else to mow my lawn whenever it's over 90F.
Granted. The crash caused by the new Maverick that took NT2Cs limbs also left you a quadriplegic. The settlement from Ford is enough to pay someone to mow your lawn. And spoon feed you gruel.
I wish for the genie to be a normal free human.
Granted. But there must be a genie to corrupt the wishes, so tag...you're it.
I wish RoneKiln hadn't distracted me while test-driving my new Maverick. :gonk:
Quote from: boskone on June 19, 2021, 04:00:25 PM
Quote from: RoneKiln on June 19, 2021, 03:48:47 PM
Quote from: boskone on June 19, 2021, 02:00:54 PM
I wish I could find someone else to mow my lawn whenever it's over 90F.
Granted. The crash caused by the new Maverick that took NT2Cs limbs also left you a quadriplegic. The settlement from Ford is enough to pay someone to mow your lawn. And spoon feed you gruel.
I wish for the genie to be a normal free human.
Granted. But there must be a genie to corrupt the wishes, so tag...you're it.
I wish RoneKiln hadn't distracted me while test-driving my new Maverick. :gonk:
Granted. You're driving your Tundra again. Wishing you had a Maverick while a malevolent genie listens nearby, ready to start the cycle of horror anew. :smiley_devil:
I wish I had a Maverick too. :clownshoes:
Granted. They're heavily pre-ordered, though, and it'll be 2024 before it gets delivered.
(Tangent: The Rangers have done well around here, and I really hope the Mavericks do as well. I would like to have reasonably-sized pickups available other than the Ridgeline.)
I wish I'd thought to put on sunscreen before mowing, so I hadn't gotten sunburnt.
Granted, but instead of a sunburn, your skin reacted badly with the chemicals and you now have a chemical burn.
I wish I had some ice cream.
I wish I had some ice cream.
Granted but it was left in the Maverick in 90 degree heat with the windows up.
I wish I could get 'rejuvenating ' treatments. This getting old sucks.
Quote from: Zed hunter on June 20, 2021, 07:48:51 AM
I wish I could get 'rejuvenating ' treatments. This getting old sucks.
Granted. You're abruptly turned into a toddler and put into foster care.
I wish we could figure out faster than light travel.
Quote from: RoneKiln on June 23, 2021, 12:09:07 AM
I wish we could figure out faster than light travel.
Granted, you do figure out FTL travel, but the time dilation effect keeps sending you back in time to the start of the pandemic in 2020 in an endless loop. Don't forget to horde some TP!
I wish my bed was more comfortable.
Quote from: NT2C on July 02, 2021, 08:27:17 AM
I wish my bed was more comfortable.
Granted, your bed is more comfortable for everyone other than you.
I wish it didn't take 10 pounds of extra equipment for me to camp for one night.
Quote from: Nyte on July 02, 2021, 08:54:02 AM
Quote from: NT2C on July 02, 2021, 08:27:17 AM
I wish my bed was more comfortable.
Granted, your bed is more comfortable for everyone other than you.
I wish it didn't take 10 pounds of extra equipment for me to camp for one night.
Granted. You freeze on the cold rocky ground.
I wish I could blow of work today without impacting anyone's projects, and climb back into bed.
Quote from: RoneKiln on July 02, 2021, 09:14:53 AM
I wish I could blow of work today without impacting anyone's projects, and climb back into bed.
Granted! Unfortunately it turns out you aren't really needed at work today or ever. Your team has figured out how to get along without you and has moved on. Since your financial viability is now in question you have decided to spend the rest of the day in bed and cry.---Sorry that was the best I could come up with.--
I wish I could still find 38 special range ammo for less money than a truck payment.
Quote from: Lettuce Pray on July 02, 2021, 09:51:08 AM
I wish I could still find 38 special range ammo for less money than a truck payment.
Granted. But when you finally pull your .38 back out, you missed some rust and--after cleaning--your barrel is closer to .44.
I wish I could get a coworker to cover my Monday shift so I don't have to.
Quote from: boskone on July 02, 2021, 10:13:01 AM
I wish I could get a coworker to cover my Monday shift so I don't have to.
Granted. Your co-worker covers your Monday shift in exchange for you covering for him on all holidays. You now get to look forward to working Christmas, New Years, Thanksgiving, etc. And, since holidays that fall on the weekend are generally celebrated the following Monday, you
still get to drag your tired self into work the occasional Monday.
I wish I had more of this excellent smoked half chicken and wonderful BBQ sauce.
Granted. Along with food poisoning.
I wish I wasn't out of whiskey. :smiley_duh:
Granted. TETOWAKI occurs while you are on a day hike. Only what's in your day pack will have to suffice.
Quote from: Zed hunter on July 07, 2021, 07:33:39 AM
Granted. TETOWAKI occurs while you are on a day hike. Only what's in your day pack will have to suffice.
I think you maybe missed the pattern: you corrupt their wish--not just add an unrelated negative condition--then make your own wish.
So, for example one might respond to RoneKiln with
Quote
Granted. You're touring the Wild Turkey brewery when the invasion starts, and alien war-drones have you bottled up inside. You have all the whiskey you could ever want.
I wish <your wish here>.
Quote from: RoneKiln on July 02, 2021, 09:41:57 PM
I wish I wasn't out of whiskey. :smiley_duh:
Granted. An explosion at the "barrelhouse" of a nearby distillery results in your house being effectively shelled with full barrels of whiskey in various stages of aging. The damage to you and your property is rather extreme but you are no longer out of whiskey.
I wish one of you guys would come pressure wash my house for me.
Quote from: NT2C on July 07, 2021, 10:39:21 AM
Quote from: RoneKiln on July 02, 2021, 09:41:57 PM
I wish I wasn't out of whiskey. :smiley_duh:
Granted. An explosion at the "barrelhouse" of a nearby distillery results in your house being effectively shelled with full barrels of whiskey in various stages of aging. The damage to you and your property is rather extreme but you are no longer out of whiskey.
I wish one of you guys would come pressure wash my house for me.
Granted, but while pressure washing, the siding strips off in large chunks, adding another repair bill to your load.
I wish my professors had reasonable expectations of the time we have to do things.
Quote from: Nyte on July 07, 2021, 12:13:42 PM
I wish my professors had reasonable expectations of the time we have to do things.
Granted. The have reasonable expectations...they just don't care.
I wish idiot end-users would stop doing shit without first asking how bad an idea it is.
Quote from: boskone on July 07, 2021, 12:34:28 PM
Granted. The have reasonable expectations...they just don't care.
I wish idiot end-users would stop doing shit without first asking how bad an idea it is.
Granted, now those idiot end users are constantly asking how bad an idea it is, you no longer sleep, nor can you eat, you simply have to answer their dumb damned questions until you have lost your own sense of reason.
I wish I could find a quality ar-15 lower receiver for a semi decent price.
Quote from: Barr on July 07, 2021, 01:49:48 PM
I wish I could find a quality ar-15 lower receiver for a semi decent price.
Granted. It isn't until the gun blows up in your face that you realize the reason the price was so good was that it was meant for non-firing
replica guns.
I wish ZS had just sold us the old forums.
Quote from: NT2C on July 07, 2021, 04:47:28 PM
I wish ZS had just sold us the old forums.
Granted. After overzealous members of the community "persuade" them to sell. Those overzealous members also unintentionally encouraged them to notify the feds over the "negotiation tactics." Now you and all the the mods are under investigation and the media is having a field day twisting the story even worse.
I wish I had more mental energy after work.
Quote from: RoneKiln on July 08, 2021, 12:00:54 AM
I wish I had more mental energy after work.
Granted. Too bad RoneKiln's little helpers end up causing a heart attack.
I wish I had the wherewithal to get some random assortment of my favorite YouTubers together, and just see what happens. (Like Alec Steele, Cole Sonne, Matt Carricker, and Andrew Rea. Just drop 'em off and tell 'em to come up with a collab.)
Quote from: boskone on July 08, 2021, 12:51:00 AM
I wish I had the wherewithal to get some random assortment of my favorite YouTubers together, and just see what happens. (Like Alec Steele, Cole Sonne, Matt Carricker, and Andrew Rea. Just drop 'em off and tell 'em to come up with a collab.)
Granted. Unfortunately, Colin Furze crashes the party, literally, in a homemade Concorde, Hickok45 and the Yankee Marshal start trading punches but YM can only hit Hickok's kneecaps. Then RuinedLeon and Viva Frei try to break them up while Simon Whistler narrates, but by that time the cops and fire department are there to deal with Colin's landing in the neighbor's attic and everyone is arrested and carted off to the local lockup where the LockPickingLawyer could totally pick the lock with a sheet of toilet paper and a pink feather from Leon's hat, but refuses because he's an officer of the court and it wouldn't be right. The judge throws the book at you as the ringleader.
I wish I had some cheesecake from Junior's in Brooklyn.
Quote from: NT2C on July 14, 2021, 01:28:25 AM
Quote from: boskone on July 08, 2021, 12:51:00 AM
I wish I had the wherewithal to get some random assortment of my favorite YouTubers together, and just see what happens. (Like Alec Steele, Cole Sonne, Matt Carricker, and Andrew Rea. Just drop 'em off and tell 'em to come up with a collab.)
Granted. Unfortunately, Colin Furze crashes the party, literally, in a homemade Concorde, Hickok45 and the Yankee Marshal start trading punches but YM can only hit Hickok's kneecaps. Then RuinedLeon and Viva Frei try to break them up while Simon Whistler narrates, but by that time the cops and fire department are there to deal with Colin's landing in the neighbor's attic and everyone is arrested and carted off to the local lockup where the LockPickingLawyer could totally pick the lock with a sheet of toilet paper and a pink feather from Leon's hat, but refuses because he's an officer of the court and it wouldn't be right. The judge throws the book at you as the ringleader.
I wish I had some cheesecake from Junior's in Brooklyn.
Sounds like the best YouTube collab video ever! That's a perfect wish fulfillment!
Fine, you swing by Boskone's place to pick up the cheescake he brought back from Brooklyn for you and arrive just in time to get arrested with all the YouTube creators. But you missed all the awesome cool stuff that led to everyone getting arrested. And the Hell's Angels sharing your cell are eyeing that cheesecake the empathetic jail guard allowed you to hang onto.
I wish I had some qualified candidates to hire.
Quote from: RoneKiln on July 15, 2021, 12:23:31 AM
Sounds like the best YouTube collab video ever! That's a perfect wish fulfillment!
I was about to post that I'm not seeing a downside here.
Quote
I wish I had some qualified candidates to hire.
Granted. You have more qualified candidates than you know what to do with...but they all want wages so high you'd have to either under-hire or terminate existing personnel.
I wish I hadn't decided it would be fine to spend 5 hours driving home after tweaking my ankle.
Quote from: boskone on July 15, 2021, 12:58:53 AM
I wish I hadn't decided it would be fine to spend 5 hours driving home after tweaking my ankle.
Granted. For some reason, you decided it would be fine to spend 5 hours
walking home after tweaking your ankle, instead. Work through the pain, I guess.
I wish I had a throne made of gummy bears in my office. :icon_crazy:
Quote from: Mr. E. Monkey on July 26, 2021, 02:22:03 PMI wish I had a throne made of gummy bears in my office. :icon_crazy:
Granted! But since you work in hell, they've all melted and you now have a bubbling, sticky, pool of melted gummy bears wall-to-wall and 3" deep in your office. You cat does not appreciate this.
I wish I knew what I wanted for dinner.
Quote from: NT2C on July 26, 2021, 04:53:16 PM
I wish I knew what I wanted for dinner.
Granted! But now you have to figure out where to find pickled flamingo tongues, you have no idea why you have a craving for silphium (and can't find it anyway), and your wife vetoed durian. But the posca's still possible!
I wish my ankle didn't
still hurt.
Quote from: boskone on July 26, 2021, 08:45:02 PM
I wish my ankle didn't still hurt.
Granted! Somewhere on that long walk home you managed to sever the main nerve bundle just below your knee and no longer have any sensation, or muscle control, from that point downward. That new ankle brace is gonna take some getting used to.
I wish I could get a good night's sleep.
Quote from: NT2C on July 26, 2021, 09:12:49 PM
I wish I could get a good night's sleep.
Granted...wait, you don't live in Prudhoe Bay, Alaska? Oh, that's awkward. Well, enjoy that two-hour "night."
I wish that mandatory training at work could be more interesting, and even fun.
Quote from: Mr. E. Monkey on July 27, 2021, 08:17:53 AM
I wish that mandatory training at work could be more interesting, and even fun.
Granted!
Your boss introduces you to your replacement that you'll have to fully train before you're let go at the end of next month. It seems your benefits package was costing too much so they want to start over again with a fresh hire.
I wish the fried chicken we ordered for dinner would get here quicker.
Quote from: NT2C on July 27, 2021, 05:57:43 PM
I wish the fried chicken we ordered for dinner would get here quicker.
Done! ...unfortunately, the chicken isn't. The salmonella is far less enjoyable than the chicken which bore it.
I wish this last hour of the work day would stop crawling by.
Quote from: boskone on July 27, 2021, 06:07:22 PM
Quote from: NT2C on July 27, 2021, 05:57:43 PM
I wish the fried chicken we ordered for dinner would get here quicker.
Done! ...unfortunately, the chicken isn't. The salmonella is far less enjoyable than the chicken which bore it.
I wish this last hour of the work day would stop crawling by.
Done! Your boss informs you that there is 3 hours of mandatory overtime today.
I wish my professors would quit adding things to assignments right before they are due.
Quote from: Nyte on July 27, 2021, 08:23:00 PM
I wish my professors would quit adding things to assignments right before they are due.
Granted. Now (like we didn't see this one coming) they add things to assignments
after they are due.
I wish I had an absolutely obscene surplus of high-quality ammunition for the firearms that I own, and still legally own and possess after this wish is granted. :greenguy:
Quote from: Mr. E. Monkey on August 09, 2021, 04:12:55 PM
I wish I had an absolutely obscene surplus of high-quality ammunition for the firearms that I own, and still legally own and possess after this wish is granted. :greenguy:
Granted. However, the ammo and firearms are only grandfathered to the owner as of now and can't be passed...and, like my coworker, you've had so many concussions that anything more energetic than a Daisy BB gun knocks you unconscious and puts you in the hospital.
I wish I hadn't eaten that second corn dog for lunch. :-\
Quote from: boskone on August 09, 2021, 04:36:37 PM
I wish I hadn't eaten that second corn dog for lunch. :-\
Granted! Something about the second corn dog seemed "off" to you, so you skipped it and just moved on to the third, fourth, and fifth, vowing next time to go for the full half dozen and new personal record.
I wish I had a good local shooting range I could use instead of all these private clubs with decades-long waiting lists.
Quote from: NT2C on August 09, 2021, 08:38:12 PM
I wish I had a good local shooting range I could use instead of all these private clubs with decades-long waiting lists.
Granted. They let any idiot come shoot and it's filled with careless morons that were vehemently antigun till last year. They're all there with their new gun, have no knowledge of gun safety, refuse to get lessons, and lecture everyone on the nonsense they learned from action movies. They manage to both gripe about how it was so much harder to buy a gun than they ever imagined while still arguing for passing more laws to make it even more difficult.
I wish I could afford a large enough piece of land in my own area to build my own range.
Quote from: RoneKiln on August 10, 2021, 11:25:33 PM
I wish I could afford a large enough piece of land in my own area to build my own range.
Granted! A previously unknown relative dies and leaves you enough money to buy enough land and build and outfit a private shooting range that would be the envy of any gun club... if you can manage to get the darn thing built. Who knew it would be so difficult to get the proper permits and approvals, or that you'd face so many legal challenges from so many groups and individuals? Is there
really such a creature as an "inverse pattern, albino, spotted northern great woodchuck" and why do the darn things only eat a certain type of fungus that only grows on a remote corner of your land. Fortunately, the damn things are stone-cold deaf, so the sounds of gunfire won't bother them, but the court-mandated steel-reinforced concrete berm all around the area, rated to stop anti-tank rounds, threatens to derail the whole project.
I wish it were easier to move all our stuff and the cats cross-country to Idaho.
Quote from: NT2C on August 11, 2021, 12:57:28 AM
I wish it were easier to move all our stuff and the cats cross-country to Idaho.
Granted! Your house burns down and you have only your least-favorite vehicle, one BOB, some slightly hairless cats (who persist in smelling like burnt fur), and a bill for the new roof. But moving is easier!
I wish management would let me fix this horrific abomination of a so-called monitoring system.
Quote from: boskone on August 11, 2021, 08:36:56 AM
I wish management would let me fix this horrific abomination of a so-called monitoring system.
Granted. In fact, they are so pleased with your initiative that they have decided to forego the old system entirely, and make
you the monitoring system. Of course, now you are required to be on-site 24-7. No overtime or holiday pay, either, since they didn't have to pay the old system anything.
I wish my fencing project was done already.
Man, if anybody wants to go in on it, there's a house for sale out here for $1.3M that has an underground range.
Quote from: Mr. E. Monkey on August 11, 2021, 08:44:11 AM
I wish my fencing project was done already.
Granted! As they rush you to the nearest hospital and you contemplate the epee hilt deep through your chest you realize that this is the end of your fencing project.
I wish
my chest didn't feel that way right now.
(neuralgia, not a heart attack)
Okay, new start:
I wish we could buy other foods in spray cans like spray cheese.
Quote from: NT2C on October 21, 2021, 02:54:13 PM
Okay, new start:
I wish we could buy other foods in spray cans like spray cheese.
Granted. I wouldn't have replaced my entire food preps and daily diet with an all spray sushi diet, but hey, you do you. I guess being the only guy that buys the gas station sushi flavored spray has its benefits.
I wish I hadn't spent the time thinking about what your spray sushi would look and smell like...
Quote from: Mr. E. Monkey on October 22, 2021, 02:58:50 PM
I wish I hadn't spent the time thinking about what your spray sushi would look and smell like...
Granted!
You go heavily into debt and sink your entire life savings into spray sushi vape juice. Those mob guys are still looking for you.
I wish this house had a basement.
Quote from: NT2C on October 22, 2021, 04:31:33 PM
Quote from: Mr. E. Monkey on October 22, 2021, 02:58:50 PM
I wish I hadn't spent the time thinking about what your spray sushi would look and smell like...
Granted!
You go heavily into debt and sink your entire life savings into spray sushi vape juice. Those mob guys are still looking for you.
I wish this house had a basement.
(pretty bad when I have to grant my own wish)
Granted!
The house now has a basement, more commonly known as a sinkhole. And it's growing.
I wish FedEx would hurry up and deliver my package, I need to run errands.
Quote from: NT2C on December 06, 2021, 10:33:34 AM
Quote from: NT2C on October 22, 2021, 04:31:33 PM
Quote from: Mr. E. Monkey on October 22, 2021, 02:58:50 PM
I wish I hadn't spent the time thinking about what your spray sushi would look and smell like...
Granted!
You go heavily into debt and sink your entire life savings into spray sushi vape juice. Those mob guys are still looking for you.
I wish this house had a basement.
(pretty bad when I have to grant my own wish)
Granted!
The house now has a basement, more commonly known as a sinkhole. And it's growing.
I wish FedEx would hurry up and deliver my package, I need to run errands.
Wish granted! Unfortunately the FedEx driver was in a hurry and needed to run errands, too. His truck rolled over in your driveway, but no worries, the recovery vehicle will be there in 3 to 5 business days.
I wish all of my Christmas shopping was already done.
Quote from: echo83 on December 06, 2021, 11:07:01 AM
I wish all of my Christmas shopping was already done.
Granted!
When you're a grinch with no friends or family you want to gift, Christmas shopping is easy!
I wish this crazy weather would decide on a season already! (currently 71 F in my AO)
Granted but the prosthetic is irritating the stump.
I wish I had more fiat to invest in crypto and precious metal.
Granted, but you really should have been more careful when you put it all into your Fiat...but on the bright side, you were able to salvage the platinum from the catalytic converter, so congratulations on scoring about 0.25 ounces. :greenguy:
I wish I had gotten my garden growing this summer.
Granted. All the time spent weeding and tending the garden disrupted everything fun you did this summer. All for some salad ingredients you didn't really want to eat in the first place. Too bad you didn't do something cool like repainting your daughter's rifle instead.
I wish I was caught up at work and could justify taking some more days off just to relax and work on home projects.
Quote from: RoneKiln on September 27, 2022, 12:22:22 AMI wish I was caught up at work and could justify taking some more days off just to relax and work on home projects.
Granted! Your proficiency and productivity at work is rewarded with a brand-new assignment from your boss. There's no way you could complete it in just 40 hours, though, so you can take it home with you. Enjoy your new home project!
I wish the milsurp firearms market would return to a reasonable price point.
No one wants to corrupt that particular wish, can't imagine why. Fine, I'll be the killjoy here so we can get this thread back on track.
Granted! A vast trove of WW2 era firearms was found in a vault on a remote island in the Aegean Sea. These flooded the market and suddenly Mauser K98s, M1 Garands, Lee Enfields and all manner of classic weapons from that era suddenly can be had for a song.
Unfortunately that island happened to be Geheimhaven, where the Nazis stashed the Lost Ark of the Coveanent. Opening that vault unleashed a swarm of vengeful holy wraiths. Who are systematically sweeping across the world, melting the faces off anyone who can't drink a Nepalese mountaineer under the table.
I wish they had kept making Indiana Jones movies before Harrison Ford became a senior citizen.
Quote from: majorhavoc on January 03, 2023, 10:56:23 AMI wish they had kept making Indiana Jones movies before Harrison Ford became a senior citizen.
Granted! Just none of them include him. Instead, in a wild attempt to join the two franchises Harrison is most known for, the lead character for the new movies is Jar Jar Binks. There are 37 episodes and a truly massive advertising budget that blankets all forms of advertising for over a decade.
I wish my battery supplies at home were better organized.
Granted!
You dump all your well organized ammunition onto the floor and use the ammo containers to organize your batteries.
Now you can't find the right caliber bullet in less than half an hour. But the cats think the pile makes a great litter box.
(https://external-content.duckduckgo.com/iu/?u=https%3A%2F%2Fi.redd.it%2F4ckb028kjf101.jpg&f=1&nofb=1&ipt=3f0d20b6beedee5b8115b0ac7cb2e969a9c75bff62dd9bbe75bef4bafac57333&ipo=images)
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Quote from: MacWa77ace on May 31, 2023, 02:40:26 PMGranted!
You dump all your well organized ammunition onto the floor and use the ammo containers to organize your batteries.
Now you can't find the right caliber bullet in less than half an hour. But the cats think the pile makes a great litter box.
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At first, I thought that really was my ammo. Then I saw the Magtech and knew it couldn't be mine because I won't use theirs. So, since you forgot your wish I get to make one up for you...
You wish you could go back in time to your high school prom, but this time have a super hot babe as your prom date.
Granted!
You travel back in time to your prom, don your tux, and go to pick up your date, and man, is she hot! She's really smoking! Unfortunately, so is the house, the limo, and the entire neighborhood due to the massive volcanic eruption taking place.
I wish I lived closer to my friends in Texas.
Quote from: NT2C on May 31, 2023, 03:47:56 PMI wish I lived closer to my friends in Texas.
Granted. You've been framed for murder! After a speedy jury trial and sentencing, you've been sent to the notorious Alan B. Polunsky unit of South Livingston, Texas' supermax prison!
I wish someone would think to add AI to traffic controls, so we don't have to wait at a red light because a witless machine is on a timer and tells us we can't go even though nobody - absolutely nobody - is coming from any direction.
Quote from: majorhavoc on May 31, 2023, 07:19:31 PMI wish someone would think to add AI to traffic controls, so we don't have to wait at a red light because a witless machine is on a timer and tells us we can't go even though nobody - absolutely nobody - is coming from any direction.
Granted!
The new AI is safety-focused and prioritizes pedestrians, motorized scooters, and bicycles in that order.
Any of these in a 20 foot radius of an intersection triggers a 5 second Yellow, 90 second Red, 5 second Green cycle.
For cars only.
After public outcry over unnecessary delays, the country adopts a Yellow, Red cycle that leads to
Deathrace levels of vehicular manslaughter.
I wish the military surplus store in my area stocked actual military surplus, instead of of lining their shelves with airsoft and mall-ninja supplies.
Granted!
You find a great deal on a surplus life raft. You take camping and test it out in the mouth of a river that empties into a large lake. In less than an hour, your surprised by a Coast Guard helicopter and multiple boats. It seems they forgot to take off the emergency locator beacon...
I wish there were QRP only frequencies for ham radio.
Quote from: Z.O.R.G. on August 06, 2023, 09:39:28 AMGranted!
You find a great deal on a surplus life raft. You take camping and test it out in the mouth of a river that empties into a large lake. In less than an hour, your surprised by a Coast Guard helicopter and multiple boats. It seems they forgot to take off the emergency locator beacon...
I wish there were QRP only frequencies for ham radio.
Granted! A dozen new QRP-only frequencies are added to the ham bands. Unfortunately, they are all secondary and clustered around 10.525 GHz, 24 GHz, and 77 GHz (and their harmonics), which are the most common frequencies used for microwave motion sensors for opening doors and detecting intruders in burglar alarm systems. Good luck doing anything usable with the new grants!
I wish I were closer to home. This trip I'm on that was supposed to be
only ~6,000 miles is now well over 7,200, with about 1,500 to go before I'm home. I've been on the road over a month now, had some wonderful, memorable experiences, and one that will haunt my nightmares for the rest of my life. I've renewed connections with people important to me and made new connections with others I've only known online. This trip has lead to new friendships and many, many moments of interesting and informative conversation with complete strangers who I will never see again in this lifetime. It has given me a life bond with a man that I respect and admire tremendously, through a shared experience that neither of us wanted but that we worked together as professionals to deal with to honor oaths that we'd both sworn many years previously. It is something only those who have stood at the pointy end of the spear and said, "Bring it, I'm ready" and then endured what came back at you can ever really understand. For a brief moment in time, he and I were a team whose sole purpose was to keep the dark hooded one with the scythe at bay and bellow defiantly in his face, "NOT.
THIS. TIME!" There were three that we could help, and we did, and one beyond the skills of any human, God rest her soul.
I am ready for this particular journey to reach its conclusion; to see the smiling face of my wife again and feel her warm embrace; to feel the furry warmth of my feline guardians and comforters; to be
home again.
Home... I am so weary now. I want to go home.
Quote from: NT2C on August 06, 2023, 11:22:15 AMQuote from: Z.O.R.G. on August 06, 2023, 09:39:28 AMI wish there were QRP only frequencies for ham radio.
Quote from: NT2C on August 06, 2023, 11:22:15 AMGranted! A dozen new QRP-only frequencies are added to the ham bands. Unfortunately, they are all secondary and clustered around 10.525 GHz, 24 GHz, and 77 GHz (and their harmonics), which are the most common frequencies used for microwave motion sensors for opening doors and detecting intruders in burglar alarm systems. Good luck doing anything usable with the new grants!
(https://hips.hearstapps.com/digitalspyuk.cdnds.net/17/19/1494260650-jurassic-park-over-our-head.gif)
Quote from: NT2C on August 06, 2023, 11:22:15 AMI wish I were closer to home. This trip I'm on that was supposed to be only ~6,000 miles is now well over 7,200, with about 1,500 to go before I'm home. I've been on the road over a month now, had some wonderful, memorable experiences, and one that will haunt my nightmares for the rest of my life. I've renewed connections with people important to me and made new connections with others I've only known online. This trip has lead to new friendships and many, many moments of interesting and informative conversation with complete strangers who I will never see again in this lifetime. It has given me a life bond with a man that I respect and admire tremendously, through a shared experience that neither of us wanted but that we worked together as professionals to deal with to honor oaths that we'd both sworn many years previously. It is something only those who have stood at the pointy end of the spear and said, "Bring it, I'm ready" and then endured what came back at you can ever really understand. For a brief moment in time, he and I were a team whose sole purpose was to keep the dark hooded one with the scythe at bay and bellow defiantly in his face, "NOT. THIS. TIME!" There were three that we could help, and we did, and one beyond the skills of any human, God rest her soul.
I am ready for this particular journey to reach its conclusion; to see the smiling face of my wife again and feel her warm embrace; to feel the furry warmth of my feline guardians and comforters; to be home again.
Home... I am so weary now. I want to go home.
Breaking script here. It has been my consistent experience in life that the full significance of a particular journey (not travel, not vaca, but a trip of purpose and serious intent) only becomes apparent after it's concluded and had time to marinate in our memory. Judging from what you've written and what Chimp shared with me privately, it's been quite an experience. And that one encounter rightfully belongs in the haunted dreams of anyone with a conscience and a soul. But what a life it is that grants us such remarkable experiences! It reminds us why we dare to stray beyond the horizons that we see every day from the comfort of our homes. [/off script]
Now someone grant NT2C his goddamned wish! And make him regret it!
Quote from: majorhavoc on August 06, 2023, 02:35:54 PMQuote from: NT2C on August 06, 2023, 11:22:15 AMQuote from: Z.O.R.G. on August 06, 2023, 09:39:28 AMI wish there were QRP only frequencies for ham radio.
Quote from: NT2C on August 06, 2023, 11:22:15 AMGranted! A dozen new QRP-only frequencies are added to the ham bands. Unfortunately, they are all secondary and clustered around 10.525 GHz, 24 GHz, and 77 GHz (and their harmonics), which are the most common frequencies used for microwave motion sensors for opening doors and detecting intruders in burglar alarm systems. Good luck doing anything usable with the new grants!
(https://hips.hearstapps.com/digitalspyuk.cdnds.net/17/19/1494260650-jurassic-park-over-our-head.gif)
Quote from: NT2C on August 06, 2023, 11:22:15 AMI wish I were closer to home. This trip I'm on that was supposed to be only ~6,000 miles is now well over 7,200, with about 1,500 to go before I'm home. I've been on the road over a month now, had some wonderful, memorable experiences, and one that will haunt my nightmares for the rest of my life. I've renewed connections with people important to me and made new connections with others I've only known online. This trip has lead to new friendships and many, many moments of interesting and informative conversation with complete strangers who I will never see again in this lifetime. It has given me a life bond with a man that I respect and admire tremendously, through a shared experience that neither of us wanted but that we worked together as professionals to deal with to honor oaths that we'd both sworn many years previously. It is something only those who have stood at the pointy end of the spear and said, "Bring it, I'm ready" and then endured what came back at you can ever really understand. For a brief moment in time, he and I were a team whose sole purpose was to keep the dark hooded one with the scythe at bay and bellow defiantly in his face, "NOT. THIS. TIME!" There were three that we could help, and we did, and one beyond the skills of any human, God rest her soul.
I am ready for this particular journey to reach its conclusion; to see the smiling face of my wife again and feel her warm embrace; to feel the furry warmth of my feline guardians and comforters; to be home again.
Home... I am so weary now. I want to go home.
Breaking script here. It has been my consistent experience in life that the full significance of a particular journey (not travel, not vaca, but a trip of purpose and serious intent) only becomes apparent after it's concluded and had time to marinate in our memory. Judging from what you've written and what Chimp shared with me privately, it's been quite an experience. And that one encounter rightfully belongs in the haunted dreams of anyone with a conscience and a soul. But what a life it is that grants us such remarkable experiences! It reminds us why we dare to stray beyond the horizons that we see every day from the comfort of our homes. [/off script]
Now someone grant NT2C his goddamned wish! And make him regret it!
I think this is one of those wishes that is just simply incorruptible.
As a moderator of UFoZS and general inhabitant of the Internet, I say we let this one stay uncorrupted and wait for his next one.
And on that note, I'm locking this thread.
Y'all feel free to start a new "Corrupt a Wish" thread. :smiley_clap: