Joke of the day

Started by Crosscut, October 21, 2021, 09:57:51 AM

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12_Gauge_Chimp

I've done a lot of stupid things in my 38 years on this primitive mudball inhabited by psychotic apes, but even I'm not dumb enough to step into the ring with a 2,000 pound animal that wants to hurt me.

That's a special kind of stupid right there. 

aikorob

Quote from: 12_Gauge_Chimp on December 13, 2023, 11:07:20 PMI've done a lot of stupid things in my 38 years on this primitive mudball inhabited by psychotic apes, but even I'm not dumb enough to step into the ring with a 2,000 pound animal that wants to hurt me.

That's a special kind of stupid right there. 

Obviously you have never experienced the POWER of positive drinking  :slide:

to quote St. Foster Brooks "with tequila, all things are possible a good idea"
I  hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence, or insanity to anyone, but they've always worked for me.

12_Gauge_Chimp

Quote from: aikorob on December 14, 2023, 01:41:22 PM
Quote from: 12_Gauge_Chimp on December 13, 2023, 11:07:20 PMI've done a lot of stupid things in my 38 years on this primitive mudball inhabited by psychotic apes, but even I'm not dumb enough to step into the ring with a 2,000 pound animal that wants to hurt me.

That's a special kind of stupid right there. 

Obviously you have never experienced the POWER of positive drinking  :slide:

to quote St. Foster Brooks "with tequila, all things are possible a good idea"

Speaking only for myself, I've never been drunk to the point where getting into a rodeo ring with a bull seemed like a good idea.

I have, however, walked into a fence, a washing machine and a support post for an awning while drunk. :smiley_crocodile:

NT2C

Quote from: 12_Gauge_Chimp on December 14, 2023, 02:22:27 PM
Quote from: aikorob on December 14, 2023, 01:41:22 PM
Quote from: 12_Gauge_Chimp on December 13, 2023, 11:07:20 PMI've done a lot of stupid things in my 38 years on this primitive mudball inhabited by psychotic apes, but even I'm not dumb enough to step into the ring with a 2,000 pound animal that wants to hurt me.

That's a special kind of stupid right there. 

Obviously you have never experienced the POWER of positive drinking  :slide:

to quote St. Foster Brooks "with tequila, all things are possible a good idea"

Speaking only for myself, I've never been drunk to the point where getting into a rodeo ring with a bull seemed like a good idea.

I have, however, walked into a fence, a washing machine and a support post for an awning while drunk. :smiley_crocodile:
I'm not saying I was dumb in my younger days, but it would have taken very little "intoxicating substance" (choose your favorites, I tried 'em all) to get me to do this stuff.  I was a bit of a danger junkie.
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MacWa77ace

I saw this before, but someone turned the dude into Hulk in this newer version. Still LMAO at this one.


https://i.imgur.com/vzEXufb.mp4
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Ever (Zombiepreparation)


echo83

A nervous skydiver on his first solo jump is going through a last-minute check with his instructor. 

"Just jump, pull your main ripcord, and wait three seconds," the instructor says. "If your main chute doesn't deploy, wait three seconds and pull your reserve ripcord. If you miss the drop zone, walk to the nearest road and flag down the bus. The bus route goes right past the drop zone." 

The skydiver jumps and pulls his main ripcord. 

Nothing.

He waits three seconds and pulls his reserve ripcord. 

Still nothing. 

"I'll bet anything that damned bus doesn't show up, either." He says to himself. 

Zed hunter

What's that in the grass that bit me on the ass, that's a moray.

NT2C

When he chops off your head and you're suddenly dead, that's samurai
Nonsolis Radios Sediouis Fulmina Mitto. - USN Gunner's Mate motto

Current Weather in My AO
Current Tracking Info for My Jeep

MacWa77ace

That hole in the stall, there on the side wall, that's a glory.
Lifetime gamer watch at MacWa77ace YouTube Channel
#TRowPriceSucks
Ask me about my Fully Semi-Automatic 30-Mag clip death gun .


NT2C

Nonsolis Radios Sediouis Fulmina Mitto. - USN Gunner's Mate motto

Current Weather in My AO
Current Tracking Info for My Jeep

12_Gauge_Chimp

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EBuff75

I started giggling just reading the headline, but the comments...  I had tears going down my face reading those!

Son Called Out For Mocking Mom After Her Roomba Escaped And Ended Up In The Pool
https://percolately.com/laugh-mom-roomba-escape-pool/
Information - it's all a battle for information. You have to know what's happening if you're going to do anything about it. - Tom Clancy, Patriot Games

EBuff75

It's the ultimate prepper jacket!  Of course, by the time you figured out which pocket whatever you needed was hiding in, you might have died...  :smiley_shrug:


https://randomitemdrop.tumblr.com/post/632382826548019200

Jacket with 175 Pockets by General Research
Information - it's all a battle for information. You have to know what's happening if you're going to do anything about it. - Tom Clancy, Patriot Games

NT2C

Quote from: EBuff75 on March 06, 2024, 10:09:28 PMIt's the ultimate prepper jacket!  Of course, by the time you figured out which pocket whatever you needed was hiding in, you might have died...  :smiley_shrug:


https://randomitemdrop.tumblr.com/post/632382826548019200

Jacket with 175 Pockets by General Research

My best friend was over last night and he and my wife were talking about this.  Are you spying on me Ebuff75?

Anyway, they asked what I'd put in all those pockets.  I told 'em, "Quarters.  Improvised body armor."
Nonsolis Radios Sediouis Fulmina Mitto. - USN Gunner's Mate motto

Current Weather in My AO
Current Tracking Info for My Jeep

Ever (Zombiepreparation)

Quote from: EBuff75 link=msg=40862 date=17097845-68It's the ultimate prepper jacket!  Of course, by the time you figured out which pocket whatever you needed was hiding in, you might have died...  :smiley_shrug:


https://randomitemdrop.tumblr.com/post/632382826548019200

Jacket with 175 Pockets by General Research

<laughing> Oh my gosh, that was supposed to be so, um, clever?... maybe on paper?  Oh the other hand, the reality maybe not so much. There are some problems, as you do point out. LOL

And... the visual is so very ROLFLOL! 

12_Gauge_Chimp

Back in the 90s, when I was a kid and collected comic books, I remember a comic I had where the main character (or possibly another character in the comic) wore a vest that had about as many pockets as that jacket.

Looked just as goofy in comic form as it does in real life.

EBuff75

It's from some designer in Japan and dates back about 30 years from what I read, so there could be an actual tie-in to a comic book!  They're also insanely expensive!  https://www.grailed.com/browse/general-research-175-pocket
Information - it's all a battle for information. You have to know what's happening if you're going to do anything about it. - Tom Clancy, Patriot Games

NT2C

Quote from: EBuff75 on March 07, 2024, 08:01:45 AMIt's from some designer in Japan and dates back about 30 years from what I read, so there could be an actual tie-in to a comic book!  They're also insanely expensive!  https://www.grailed.com/browse/general-research-175-pocket
I was wondering why you posted this in JotD, but then I saw that they were proudly offering FREE SHIPPING on one of their $8,500 jackets.  :smiley_crocodile:

I'm trying to picture some dude looking at buying one and turning it down because he had to pay $15 for shipping.
Nonsolis Radios Sediouis Fulmina Mitto. - USN Gunner's Mate motto

Current Weather in My AO
Current Tracking Info for My Jeep

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